Having lived with the abuser
A spouse's self-petition must show that you lived with the abuser during the marriage. There is no minimum period, and if you are in the United States when you file, a home you shared abroad can count. You do not have to live with the abuser now, and filing does not require you to.
Current as of October 2026. We re-check this page every quarter and after any change in the law.
"Resided with" is one of the spousal elements under INA 204(a)(1)(A)(iii)(II)(dd) and (B)(ii)(II)(dd). You must have lived with the abuser during the marriage. It is usually the easiest to prove, because you lived it. It is also the element where the abuser's control of the paperwork can make the obvious hard to show. This page explains what the rule asks and how people prove it.
USCIS rewrote its VAWA policy on December 22, 2025 (Policy Alert PA-2025-33). It now requires that the self-petitioner resided with the abuser during the qualifying relationship, and primary evidence of a good-faith marriage where available. The change applies to petitions pending on that date and to new filings.
What the rule asks, and what it does not
| Question | Answer | Authority |
|---|---|---|
| Did you live with the abuser during the marriage? | Required for a spouse | INA 204(a)(1)(A)(iii)(II)(dd), (B)(ii)(II)(dd); PA-2025-33 |
| For how long? | No minimum period | USCIS Policy Manual Vol. 3, Part D, ch. 2 |
| Can a home abroad count? | Yes, if you are in the United States when you file. A visit while living elsewhere does not count | USCIS Policy Manual Vol. 3, Part D, ch. 2 |
| Do you have to live together now? | No. The element looks back, not at today | INA 204(a)(1)(A)(iii)(II)(dd), (B)(ii)(II)(dd) |
| What counts as residing? | Your principal, actual dwelling place. Visiting while you lived somewhere else does not count, except visitation for children | 3 USCIS-PM D.2(F) |
| An abused child? | You reside or have resided with the abusive parent; "residence includes any period of visitation." Unlike spouses and parents, a child must have been living with or visiting the parent when the abuse happened | INA 204(a)(1)(A)(iv), (B)(iii); 3 USCIS-PM D.2(E), (F) |
| An abused parent? | You reside or have resided with the citizen son or daughter | INA 204(a)(1)(A)(vii) |
These rules are stated as of October 2026.
This element is different from a second rule about where you live when you file. You may file from outside the United States only if the abuser is employed abroad by the U.S. government, is a member of the uniformed services, or subjected you or your child to battery or extreme cruelty in the United States (INA 204(a)(1)(A)(v) and (B)(iv)). See survivors abroad.
Evidence of shared residence
USCIS must consider any credible evidence (INA 204(a)(1)(J)). The Policy Manual lists children's birth certificates; leases, deeds and mortgages; insurance policies, bank or financial records and tax filings with a common address; school or medical records; and detailed affidavits from friends and family (3 USCIS-PM D.2(F)). Use what exists, and explain in your declaration why the rest does not.
- A lease, deed or mortgageBoth names, at one address.A lease in the abuser's name alone, plus anything that puts you at that address.
- Mail to you at the homeBank statements, government letters, packages, medical bills.Online accounts or delivery histories in your name that show the address.
- Your ID or records listing the addressA driver's license, a state ID, a school or employer record.Any record you can request in your own name.
- Children's school or medical recordsBoth parents at one address.A letter from the school or doctor's office.
- Insurance, bank or tax records with a common addressPolicies, statements or returns that list you both at the home.Records in your own name at that address.
- Statements from a landlord, neighbor or visitorWho saw you living there.Friends or relatives who visited the home.
- Photos inside the homeOrdinary life in the shared space.Your description of the home: the rooms, the street, the routines.
- Your declarationWhen you moved in, where, for how long, and what daily life was like.Always available. The detail is what makes it believable.
If the abuser kept these papers, see documents the abuser took. If you have almost nothing on paper, see evidence without documents.
If you still live with the abuser
Many people file while still living with the abuser. The element looks back, so living together now does not hurt it. What matters most is safety: where the notices go, where the copies are kept, and which phone we call. Read the safe filing checklist.
Under 8 U.S.C. 1367(a)(2), the government may not disclose information about your petition to anyone, with limited exceptions. That includes the abuser. It does not stop the abuser from seeing your mail or your phone. See will my abuser find out.
Staying or leaving is your choice
This site does not tell you to leave or to stay. Each choice has effects on the case, and we explain them at the consultation. A safety plan is made with a domestic violence advocate. If you are in danger now, call 911.
Read next: good-faith marriage, good moral character, survivors abroad, or the self-petition overview.
Common questions
How long do we have to have lived together?
There is no minimum period (USCIS Policy Manual Vol. 3, Part D, ch. 2). What you need to show is that you lived together during the marriage. A visit while you lived somewhere else does not count. A short period can be enough if the record shows it.
We lived together only in another country. Does that count?
It can, if you are in the United States when you file. In that case the shared residence can have been in or outside the United States (USCIS Policy Manual Vol. 3, Part D, ch. 2). A separate rule decides whether you may file from abroad. See our page on survivors abroad.
I am filing as a child. Do visits to my parent count?
Yes. For a child's self-petition the statute says residence includes any period of visitation (INA 204(a)(1)(A)(iv), (B)(iii), as of October 2026). For spouses and parents, a visit while living elsewhere does not count.
Do I have to move out before I file?
No. The element asks whether you lived together during the marriage, not whether you live apart now. Whether to stay or leave is your decision. We explain what each choice means for the case, and a safety plan is made with a domestic violence advocate.
The lease and bills were only in the abuser's name. What do I use?
USCIS must consider any credible evidence under INA 204(a)(1)(J). Mail addressed to you at the home, school or medical records, statements from neighbors or a landlord, and your own detailed description of the home all help. Say in your declaration why the papers are in one name.
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